This 9/11 Survivors Thoughts On This Day

[Beetwasher]

"9/11" survivor. Yeah, I guess I am, though some might quibble. I wasn't actually in the buildings, I was outside, under them when the second plane hit.

Images are burned in my brain from that day. Flashes of things.

The man who got on the subway the stop before I got off saying "the world is blowing up!". Everyone ignored him, they thought he was just another crazy guy.

Then climbing up from the subway at Fulton and Broadway, a stop early because the train was running so slow (heh). I and a bunch of other people from the train walked out of the subway station. I took a few stops, engrossed in my own world of inner thought, not registering much, but then, then I started to notice some things.

Sheets of paper rained from the sky, drifting down like oversized dead leaves. I looked up and saw the river of black smoke pouring across the bright blue sky. I couldn't see the towers, they were obscured by the building directly in front of me on Broadway.

"A fire" I thought. A big one. Then I began to notice there were hardly any people around either. Odd. Eeery. Quiet.

I started walking East to my office which was on Wall St. That's when I heard the monstrous sound of the impact of the second plane.

I just can't describe it except to say it was monstrous. And echoed and reverberated off the canyon-like walls of the city.

Then there was the debris, chunks, some flaming, raining down. A man ran around the corner screaming "She's been cut in half!". Yeah, that one really stands out.

I took off towards my office. More people were around as I got further from the scene. I began to hear snippets of conversation and crying. The receptionist from my office was on the street outside hysterical "They're jumping from the windows!".

I made the mistake of looking back. That one's seared in there pretty well too.

I got up to the TV's in my office. Even though the second plane had already hit, it wasn't reported yet. Everyone in the office still thought it was one plane. I had no idea what I'd just heard outside and was just learning about a plane hitting. I watched. Then they reported the second plane and the pieces came together. "It's an act of war" I said to no one in particular.

I and a bunch of my coworkers joined the exodus, heading uptown to my home on the Upper East Side. A long walk. We stopped at a bar around 23 street that had opened early. They were putting out trays of food. The bar was open. I had a couple. I got on line for the payphone and tried a few times to get in touch. I got my sister in Colorado, somehow, and asked her to let the family know I was fine.

I went back to the bar at sat there for a bit and watched. Watched. As the first of the towers collapsed. There was a collective gasp from the entire city. I buried my head in my arms on the bar.

The rest is history.

I guess I do feel some closure with the news of Bin Laden's death. There is that. There are also other things. I'm trying to figure out what the most predominant feeling is and I guess it's a little difficult. There's relief. There's pleasant surprise. For some reason I feel like I've been given a gift. I don't want to say I'm elated, though I might be. But I think it's more a feeling of hope actually. Hope that we can close a chapter and move on to more important things. Not that killing Bin Laden wasn't important, it was, but more as a symbolic act. I'm happy that this has been accomplished so that we can get back to the more tangible progress of building and creating. Not killing and destroying.

One of the biggest things that really bothered me about the Bush admin. was it's cynical use of 9/11. The way they used it as a shield and a club. They used it for everything, from starting wars to awarding tax breaks. It's so refreshing that Obama has not done this and that gives me hope.

Yeah. That's it. That's the big one. Hope. And pride. Pride that we have competent leaders again that want to accomplish things and are capable of doing so.

So on this day, another historic day, I remember. Yes, I remember my own personal story, but there's much, much more important things to remember today. The brave men and women who died that day trying to save others for one. We also need to remember how the tragedy was used so cynically in their name and never allow that to happen again. But we also need to remember how we as a nation came together as one and forgot our differences. So I have hope. Hope that we can do that again, but this time to create, not destroy.

So this chapter is closed and a new one opens. Let it be the chapter of effective, competent government that works towards building, not destroying.

Cross posted at DKos: http://www.dailykos.com/story/2011/05/02...etail=hide

[TheNewMe]

It made me cry to remember the day. But it also gives me hope

[Beetwasher]

(05-02-2011 10:41 AM)TheNewMe Wrote:  It made me cry to remember the day. But it also gives me hope

Thanks!

[Cha]

Thank you for this, Beetwasher..it has me crying but that's okay. It's cathartic to remember and get it out.. and for those who weren't there to have some idea what it was like and give you all our compassion for what everyone went through.

[Beetwasher]

(05-02-2011 04:02 PM)Cha Wrote:  Thank you for this, Beetwasher..it has me crying but that's okay. It's cathartic to remember and get it out.. and for those who weren't there to have some idea what it was like and give you all our compassion for what everyone went through.

Thanks Cha, it's cathartic to write it and the tears well up when I re-read it. It's an emotional subject for me, one I don't write about too often, but something I think needs telling. I'm compelled to tell it, I think.

Thanks!

[Cha]

(05-02-2011 08:49 PM)Beetwasher Wrote:  

(05-02-2011 04:02 PM)Cha Wrote:  Thank you for this, Beetwasher..it has me crying but that's okay. It's cathartic to remember and get it out.. and for those who weren't there to have some idea what it was like and give you all our compassion for what everyone went through.

Thanks Cha, it's cathartic to write it and the tears well up when I re-read it. It's an emotional subject for me, one I don't write about too often, but something I think needs telling. I'm compelled to tell it, I think.

Thanks!

And, this being the perfect time to let it all out again. President Obama giving the green light to the Secret Navy Seal Team after such a long time of planning and practicing to catch the heinous monster who masterminded the genocide on 9/11. So he could hide in a Million $$$$ Compound and send the brainwashed to their deaths along with the innocents they blew up with themselves.

I can't even imagine the horror and terror and now 10 years later bin laden is finally caught and it would have been alive but he chose to shoot it the fuck out..and what's this I hear about him or one of his couriers using a woman as a shield? How so like those maniacal cowards.

[spazito]

Very moving and powerful thoughts. Thank you for sharing this.

[Beetwasher]

(05-02-2011 05:24 PM)spazito Wrote:  Very moving and powerful thoughts. Thank you for sharing this.

Thanks Spaz, I appreciate the sentiment.

[sandnsea]

Thank you.

Hope... Hope that we can close a chapter and move on to more important things.

And pride. Pride that we have competent leaders again that want to accomplish things and are capable of doing so.

Yeah. That's it.

[Beetwasher]

(05-02-2011 09:48 PM)sandnsea Wrote:  Thank you.

Hope... Hope that we can close a chapter and move on to more important things.

And pride. Pride that we have competent leaders again that want to accomplish things and are capable of doing so.

Yeah. That's it.

Thanks Sandnsea!

[Hekate]

Thank you for remembering, for witnessing, for surviving to tell the tale. All of those things are important.

Thank you for being here.

[Beetwasher]

(05-02-2011 10:14 PM)Hekate Wrote:  Thank you for remembering, for witnessing, for surviving to tell the tale. All of those things are important.

Thank you for being here.

Thanks Hekate!